Memorizing: Romans 1:1-17
Thoughts: Good
I've been thinking a lot about what I wrote yesterday, and some of the comments that were made in response. I must admit now, in hindsight, that the category "Entertainment" was rather vague, but at the same time there is a valid concern that I have. Let me 'splain.
I'm diagnosed A.D.D. Now, hang on before you roll your eyes. No, I don't use that as an excuse for not getting work done. No, I don't say 'oops, I forgot my medicine today, sorry for being a jerk.' But I genuinely have it. For as long as I can remember I've always had significant trouble concentrating for any length of period of time. If I were to describe my mind, it's like having 10 radios going at the same time, which is one of the reasons I often jump from one thing to another and can easily end a day having starting 20 things and having finished none. Several years ago a real doctor went through the proper steps to diagnose me. We tried medicines. I have to say that the medicines really helped me, quite a bit actually. After a few weeks I found that the radios had dropped from about 10 to 2. Sitting still for longer periods of time and concentrating became easier, and I was able to focus more on one task. But there were some drawbacks. All the meds I tried seems to have two particularly negative side effects. They made me incredibly hungry and incredibly UN-sleepy. There were a couple of nights there where I didn't sleep perhaps more than an hour. I was laying there in the middle of the night starving or just plain tossing and turning, wide awake. As a result the negative effects of not sleeping far outweighed the positive effects of being able to concentrate better. So I stopped the meds.
I take no meds now, and yes I still feel like I'm listening to 10 radios sometimes, but I've realized that through structure and discipline bathed in prayer I can function and be productive. Try playing 10 radios all on different stations sometime. It is possible to focus on just one, but you have to work hard. So I setup schedules for the week. I have task lists for each day of things I want to accomplish. I set priorities of things that must be done, need to be done soon, and things that I want to do, all the while praying that the Lord would help and enable me to accomplish my work. The "noise" is still loud but I've learned to live with it.
In yesterday's post I talked about wanting to be careful with "entertainment" time, and the struggle I had had in accurately defining some of my tasks under that heading. I'm convicted by Ephesians 5:15-16, "Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, 16making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil." I want to make the most of my time each day. Is there anything wrong with playing a game of computer Scrabble? No, of course not. Is there even anything wrong with taking a work break to play a game of computer Scrabble? Still, I think not. But is there something wrong with playing computer Scrabble for 3 hours when there is pressing work to be done, when assignments are due post haste? Yes, absolutely. Such is not wise living. My desire is this, to use my time wisely each day. To complete my responsibilities and "make the most of every opportunity."
In the days to come I hope to find a new category, something that indicates if I'm completing my work and using my time wisely each day.
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